My bloody days........

My days getting worse and worse.
I am totally out of control.
Everyday of mine sucks to a great extent.
While i haven' think of any world to describe.
I am getting more and more pessimistic.
I try to convince myself think positively and i failed.
Nothing can cheer me up.
while there wasn't anything or anyone can make me happy.
Maybe i am just too demanding.
How can i ppl like me be so demanding?
I don't have the right to be demanding.
I am nothing, but trash.
I know that very well.

I always claim myself to be the prodigy,
But i know i wasn't.
I am just a rascal without any quality.
What are my qualities?
Excess fats on me.
The grassy hair.
The ugly face.
The pores bigger than asshole.
The stupid and detestable character.
What else?
Still got many many more.

I know myself well,
I don't wish to live in dream.
In the past,
i like to run away from reality.
I even have inrealistic wishes,
such as becoming
a beauty queen,
a model,
married a rich husband.
Now i am older.
Dream is dream.
U can't always live in dream.
No matter what u still have to wake up one day.