Yes.I am a pessimist.
That's something that I can never change,
unless I can change the way that life is.
My upbringing shapes the way that my life is.
I hate my life since the day that I was born.
I hate to be independent when being independent is part of your life long routine.
I hate acting optimistic when you know you are not.
I hate times when I feel so hopeless.
Yet I know I have to be strong.
What to do when you have such destiny?
All of us are just puppets of life.
Being manipulated uncontrolly.
Things are not under my control.
Maybe I won't be furthering my study
though it is like a dream from young.
Firstly monetary constraint,
secondly family problem.
Maybe I will be living alone from next Feb onwards.
I don't mind living alone.
Then I will find a job.
Perhaps a job that earns me like $1500 per month,
which will take forever to save up for a house.
Maybe I will be happier.
At least I am living for myself,
in the way that I wish life to be.
Not for anyone else.
Maybe I will never have a chance in acheveing my dream in this life.
It will only come true when I am in my dream.
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